words

I'm trying to understand words. Although I use a lot of words, I don't feel like I really know what many of the words mean. Because of this, I use Strong's Exhaustive Concordance when I read the Bible. Strong's goes through every single word alphabetically with the scriptural reference and a number that refers to the Hebrew (Old Testament) or Greek (New Testament) word, giving me their meanings and roots and English words (English uses a lot more words than the Greek or Hebrew languages do) for each word in the Bible. This is very helpful and has given me many insights.

This week I have been preparing a lesson for the young women at church about honesty and Integrity and learned some things that were really interesting to me.

The word honest/honestly/honesty isn't used in the Old Testament, so there are no Hebrew words, but there are 11 references in the New Testament translated from three different Greek words, which are: "valuable, virtuous, beautiful, fair, worthy, honorable, grave (I had to look this word up in a regular dictionary - it means to have a serious and dignified quality or demeanor), venerable (looked this up too - it means to be accorded a great deal of respect, esp. because of age, wisdom, or character)."

In Philippians 4:8 and 1 Timothy 2:2 honest and honesty mean "to revere, adore, be devout, religious, worship."

Honesty also cross referenced to the root Thummim, which was listed as "one of the epithets of the objects in the high-priest's breastplate as an emblem of complete truth." (This may trigger for you "Urim and Thummim" - or in other words, "light and truth.")

I decided to look at Integrity and try to understand the difference between honesty and integrity.

The word Integrity is used in the Old Testament and has two closely related Hebrew words which mean: "perfection (Hebrew for complete and whole), innocence (Hebrew for cleanness), full, simplicity (Hebrew for sincerity), and upright."

In the young women personal progress under Integrity value #1 it says that "Integrity is the willingness and desire to live by our beliefs and standards." It then references Moroni 10:32 and 33.

"Yea, come unto Christ, and be perfected in him, and deny yourselves of all ungodliness, and if ye shall deny yourselves of all ungodliness and love God with all your might, mind, and strength, then is his grace sufficient for you, that by his grace ye may be perfect in Christ; and if by the grace of God ye are perfect in Christ, ye can in nowise deny the power of God.

And again, if ye by the grace of God are perfect in Christ, and deny not his power, then are ye sanctified in Christ by the grace of God, through the shedding of the blood of Christ, which is in the covenant of the Father unto the remission of your sins, that ye become holy, without spot."

I now have a much greater understanding of what it means to be honest and have integrity.

Freedom to truly be Free

(After giving my talk yesterday at church I was asked if I could share it. My son suggested doing it on my blog. So here is mostly what I said - with a few changes - and additions at the end since I ran out of time - but this is what I wanted to say.)

As I have been working in my garden in the mornings I listen to my ipod and have lately been listening to Earl Nightengale. He stated that the most important thing is freedom and suggests that most of us would not have thought of that because we have never been without freedom. It is kind of like air - we don't really think about it until we aren't getting it.

Lee served in the Air Force for 22 years and we lived in Germany for four of those years (in the 1980's). While there we traveled into East Berlin a couple of times through an opening of the Berlin Wall known as Checkpoint Charlie. The Berlin Wall, built in 1961, was 103 miles long and separated East and West Berlin. The Soviet-dominated Eastern Bloc officially claimed that the wall was erected to protect its population but in reality it served to prevent massive emigration and defection - with a death strip. The museum at Checkpoint Charley has artifacts and examples of how 5,000 people attempted to escape in order to be free.

Bringing this closer to home, in the October 2000 general conference, Elder F. Enzio Busche (from Germany) spoke about freedom, and the opportunity we each have of being truly free. "This isn't the freedom from malice or pain or submission that is usually addressed and fought for but as members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints we learn the true dimension of the word freedom - the freedom to act in the dignity of our own choice."

We fought to maintain our agency and God made sure we got it. In Moses 7:32 it says, "the Lord said unto Enoch: Behold these thy brethren; they are the workmanship of mine own hands and I gave unto them their knowledge, in the day I created them; and in the Garden of Eden, gave I unto man his agency."

The other end of the stick with agency is accountability. Doctrine and Covenants 101:78 says, "That every man may act in doctrine and principle pertaining to futurity, according to the moral agency which I have given unto him, that every man may be accountable for his own sins in the day of judgment."

Freedom, according to Elder Busche, "means to have matured to the full knowledge of our many responsibilities as a human being" because as John 8:32 says -"And ye shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free."

Although as members of the Church we are blessed to know the truth, we often build walls around ourselves thinking they will protect us, when in reality they are holding us back.

Some walls Elder Busche spoke of are: 1) Feeling that we are victims of circumstance and 2) Narrow thinking born in tragedies of false traditions.

According to Elder Busche, "we become alive as we take, knowingly, full responsibility for our own life and as we stop blaming circumstance. We must come to the realization that everything we do, say and especially think has consequences to how free we really are."

Being in the military meant Lee was gone a lot of the time. This forced me to rely on the Lord - who freed me when I felt I was a victim of circumstance and also freed me from my own narrow thinking.

One time I felt I was a victim of circumstance was when Lee was in Officer Training School. We were living in my parent's basement and my dad was called to be Mission President. They ended up selling the home and leaving and I came with the home. My two oldest were one and two at the time and I was really missing Lee. One night I remember feeling that this was so hard that I was going to die. I didn't think I could handle it any longer. So I prayed - for a long time. When I got done, amazingly I no longer missed Lee. The despair was gone and I was able to go on and enjoy playing with my two little boys, making the most of the situation.

Another experience while in the military was when we lived in Germany. Because we lived in a new housing unit owned by the Germans but leased to the military, I was asked if a group of Generals and Colonels could come and see my apartment. I agreed, thinking this would be a good way to help my husband in his new career as a new officer in the Air Force. Lee was gone at the time (he was gone most of the time) and it was exhausting to get the home clean and keep it clean with four little kids five and under. It turned out that on the day they were to come the grade school on base was having picture day for the siblings. In Germany pictures are a different size and I had frames for the kids that didn't fit so I really wanted the younger kids to get their pictures taken. This would also give us something to do while keeping the house clean, and then get back in time for the tour - or so I thought. The line was really long and kids didn't cooperate - including Andy. (He never would smile so the picture I have of him is not a very happy face). We rushed back to Egelsbach (there is no speed limit on the Autobahn) but to my horror as I turned the corner to the apartment complex the bus of Generals and Colonels was leaving. They had come and I wasn't there! I felt terrible! I wondered what they thought of me and if it would ruin my husbands career. I was exhausted from the cleaning and wasted from the pressure. The problem was, I had four little kids who were also very fussy - probably because of what I had just put them through. And there was no one else to take care of them but me. I didn't know what to do. I needed help to be able to have the energy and love my kids needed. So I went into my room and prayed. While praying a thought came into my mind - "Your home is sacred. They didn't need to go through it." This thought changed my whole perspective. I was happy I had made the choice I did. I got the pictures taken I wanted and it was better that I wasn't home. I didn't worry any more and now that my house was all clean I was free to take my kids to the park and play the rest of the day. I had gone into my room totally overwhelmed and frustrated and came out happy and full of life - all from the power of my Heavenly Father to help me change my thoughts.

I know it is true what Elder Busche says: "Jesus Christ wants to empower our lives according to our own righteous choices, to that dimension that, through our faith and our doings, the circumstances whose prisoners we were in the past will eventually change. In the Book of Mormon we learn that the Redeemer monitors our lives, together with a multitude of holy angels. We read: "Have Miracles ceased? Behold I say unto you, Nay; neither have angels ceased to minister unto the children of men. For behold, they are subject unto him, to minister according to the word of his command, showing themselves unto them of strong faith." (Moroni 7:29-30)"

Miracles do happen. In 1989 the Berlin Wall came down. I didn't witness it - but I have a piece of the wall to prove it. But I am a witness that through the Savior and His atonement our personal walls can come down. When I was stake Primary President I realized that there was something blocking me from having as close of a relationship with the Savior as I wanted. I wasn't sure why and didn't know how to change it. I prayed and asked for help. I have found that the things that Heavenly Father wants to help us with the most is our family and our relationship with the Savior. I started seeing things in the scriptures I had never noticed before. The spirit taught me what was wrong and I was able to break down the walls holding me back. We have the opportunity each week as we take the sacrament to tear down walls and let the Lord help us truly be free.

lessons learned in chemistry 101

When I was in junior high I had a science class that made me never to want to take another science class. This became a major obstacle for me as I contemplated getting a bachelor of science degree. In 2008 I was very blessed to have Dr. Anderson for my chemistry teacher at BYU. He began each class with a spiritual thought, used iclickers to test our understanding in class, and had a wonderful TA. I made it through the class and did much better than I anticipated - learning that I really like chemistry and sorry that it took me so long to learn that.

Here are just some of the lessons I learned in Chemistry 101

1. Truths don't always make sense - but that doesn't mean they aren't true.
2. Experiments help you visualize what is happening and you can understand it better - or at least believe that it is true.
3. The more you study the more you learn - so be patient and keep studying!
4. There are things that exist that can't be seen with your natural eyes, but the evidence is there.
5. It is possible for things to change from one state to another but it requires action, the right positioning, or some pressure.
6. Sometimes we need extra help and should find someone else who knows how and wants to help.
7. Sometimes energy is released and sometimes it is absorbed.
8. Conversion factors help us get from where we are to where we want to go which can be applied lots of different ways.
9. There is power within each of us.
10. Sharing makes you stronger (think bonding)
11. All things seek to be balanced.
12. To be noble means that you are very stable, but that is very rare.
13. The one who created all things knows how it all works.

entering the social media world by reviewing the past

This has taken me awhile to get to - but I now have a blog! In fact, I have two. This blog is more personal and the other one - Kids Creating Art - is for a social venture I am working on - but first, I need to bring you up to date since I keep getting asked what my plans are after I graduate. Before I can answer that question, however, I need to tell you where I have been so you'll understand where I am at and then if you choose, you can continue the journey with me as I press forward.

Three years ago I felt strongly that I needed to return to BYU and finish the degree I had started 30 years earlier. I was accepted back as a full-time student with the plan to take 18 credit hours straight for two years and then return to Alaska where I would design properties from the subdivisions we were developing which would have hopefully been all sold by then. We packed up our household (with a lot of help - especially since in the midst of it my thyroid went crazy) and drove to Utah. It was great to be back at school, but I quickly discovered that it was not realistic to take 18 credit hours and that some of the classes I had taken previously needed to be retaken. Consequently this four-year program will take me .... four years. I am nearing the end, however, with only two more semesters left before I graduate with a bachelors in Landscape Management with an emphasis in design and a minor in business. It is difficult to adequately express what these three years have been like for me. Each semester brought a tremendous amount of new challenges and growth, awareness and stretching such as feeling my brain burn while doing accounting, chemistry and algebra, learning that I am passionate about pruning trees and starting businesses, writing a children's book called Isaiah's Garden, being able to communicate in Spanish, starting a social business called The Kids Creating Art Business Club, becoming a Jr. Master Gardener leader, working on another business called FloraWell and learning how to do landscape designs. With all this learning, however, what I feel I have really learned is how much I don't know and want to learn and that now I am just at the beginning of being able to learn and am ready to apply what I have been learning.

Before I can do that, however, I would like to share with you some of the things I have been learning - in my next entry.